Grumble, grumble, grumble

I've closed the last three nights. When I get off work I'm too jazzed up from the frenetic pace of closing to go to bed. But I'm too tired to do anything productive. And I've had to get up and try to get going each morning to get some things graded for school. So each day, not quite enough sleep.

It finally caught up with me this morning. Cat managed to force the bedroom door open and get in. And every time my alarm went off he started whining for me to get up and feed him. I was too awake to ignore it and too tired to actually get up and chase him out. My mood is getting worse and worse.

I finally force myself out of bed. Cat keeps whining. I keep getting angrier. Dog wakes up and I hear her start whining to get walked. And I look down at the floor of the bathroom.

Wife has been letting her dirty clothes pile up on the bathroom floor. When it was just a little bit it was funny because Dog took to lying on them. It's become a favorite hang out for her. But the pile was reaching epic volume. Well, for a dirty clothes pile on the bathroom floor.

What I should have done was ask Wife to clean it up. And hopefully she would have. If she hadn't I could have been justified in being mad. But I was in a bad place. So I picked them up and shoved them in her hamper.

Okay, this isn't much of a story if it ends here. So then I took the hamper and put it right in front of the bedroom door. The bedroom. Where Wife continued to sleep while I had to be awake.

Yes, totally passive aggressive. She did nearly fall over it she later reported.

So it turns out I can be a jerk sometimes too.

Double tall half caf soy cup of my dignity

"Boy it must be great to be a professor, you get summers off." Yeah, I ever get a summer off I'll let you know how that goes. I was scheduled to teach two classes this summer. If I had, we would have been fine financially this summer and I would have had two months to work on my research and prep for next year's classes.

But one of them got canceled when not enough students signed up by the very ridiculous deadline. We had budgeted around that money. That meant get a summer part time job. And when you're needing a quick paycheck that means service industry. Late 30s with a PhD and I'm slinging coffee again. Gotta do what you gotta do.

I keep hoping I've reached a point in my life where I don't have to supplement my income by putting on an apron and handling food products. And I keep finding out I'm wrong.

On the plus side, you get some really crazy stories working the service industry. So over the next few weeks I'm going share them with you. I'll try to stay away from the ones that will make you feel uncertain about eating out anymore but no promises.

Mea Culpa

Wife promises that she has not touched the Netflix queue. And while she has lied to protect herself in the past, I don't think this is the case here.

So now it's just the bastards at Netflix messing with me.....

Not Cool

What should be the penalty when someone goes in and reorders your Netflix queue?

I have a pretty strong suspicion that Wife has been sorting things around a little bit. Now don't get me wrong, it's not like I'm selfish. But we get three movies at a time. We have set it up that she gets one at a time and has her own queue with whatever movies she wants to see. From time to time she has movies I like but for the most part it is all her and her tastes and I don't interfere. She also is very slow to get around watching her movie. That's fine, that's her choice.

And then I have a queue that has two movies. I try hard to make sure that one of them is something we both want to see. And then the other movie is supposed to be something for me. And I'm likely to stay up late and watch it after she's gone to bed, send it back in, and get something quickly.

Only fair, right? I watch more movies, I get more movies. But lately I have been noticing that the movie that I put on top to replace "my" movie isn't the next one to be shipped. Lately the movie being shipped is one of those "our" movies. Once or twice this happens, I figure it is just coincidence that the movie I wanted wasn't available so it jumped a spot.

But I realized the movie being sent out today is not "my" movie, which it should be. And I checked yesterday that it was my movie at the top of the list. So maybe it was again skipped you might be thinking. But the movie being shipped wasn't in the second spot either. Or the third. So she went in and reordered the list. Without talking to me about it. This will not stand. I'm tempted to go in and delete her entire queue in retaliation. But that's too big a penalty.

So what is a fair come back? If you know, let me know. Cause this deserves something.

Also, if you want to be a Netflix contact of mine, drop me a comment.

Why Wife and I are different people

So I've been browsing various forums cause I'm thinking of buying a 200 cc GT or a Vespa S and want to get a good deal on one used if I can find one.

And while I've been looking I've noticed that a lot of people are trying to dump 50 cc ET 2s and LX50s. If I tried I could probably find one for around 1500 bucks. Maybe less if I tried. Obviously I don't want one of these but I've got a spare 150 leader engine that I picked up cheap for a project and even though I'm not doing that project I kept the engine as a spare just in case. It's pretty complete, even has the rear wheel and wouldn't take a whole lot to just bolt it into a new frame.

So I'm thinking it might not be a bad idea to pick up one of these cheap 50 cc bikes and swap out the engine for my spare. I can sell the 50 cc engine to cover the costs of getting the local scooter shop to help me make sure the wiring is done right and maybe even pick up a few bucks on top of that. Then I sell the Fly 150 or the new
Frankenstein bike and make a few bucks on that deal and still have a 150 cc bike.

So I mention this bit of brilliance to Wife and her response is "You already have a 150 cc scooter. I don't see why you would want to do this."

And I realize if I have to explain she's just not going to understand.

Penguins update

They won their first series, sweeping the Ottawa Senators.

Not saying nothing, just providing the facts.

Show your love

It's playoff time in the NHL. Time to grow your beard.

That's right. If you're not aware of this practice, during hockey playoffs, you're not supposed to shave till your team is eliminated or wins the cup. Not all players participate but a lot do. In fact, at least some of the credit for the Anaheim Ducks winning last year should go to the impressive salt and pepper lumberjack look of Scott Niedermayer. A beard that impressive deserves rewarding.

I'm a Penguins fan. I can remember the night that they won their first Stanley Cup. I was so happy I called my dad. After all, it was watching the late 70s NY Islanders that sparked my interest in the sport. I don't think my dad was quite as excited as I was but he's not the biggest phone talker in the world so maybe if we were watching together it might have been a different story.

That's a long way to get to the gist of today's post. The Penguins' best player is a little challenged in the facial hair department. He's too young to grow much, though he is trying. So I'm pledging my help in that department. I'm not quite in the "shave twice a day" range but I'm not too far off. So I'm not shaving till the Penguins are out. Wife did insist that I trim it up a little so I won't be total mountain man.

I think she's just jealous that she can't grow her own.

I got rickrolled

Victims of my pranks: Wife and the official Mom of Professor Matthew. I told Wife I was going to call Mom and tell her we are expecting. Which we are, just a dog not the baby that Mom is highly desirous of us to have. And I was going to tell Mom it was Wife's idea.

So then when I went actually call Mom, Wife said, in a very insistent voice, "You better not tell her it is my idea."

I responded with, "Honey, what day is it?"

To which she replied, "Damn it, you got me too!" and then stomped up the stairs.

I have to admit that I caved pretty quick after I told Mom we were expecting and she asked if it was a baby. I told her that it would be another dog. The funny part was that was the part she didn't believe, it would be a dog not a baby. She had to be told she was not being pranked anymore to realize she was being pranked in the first place. I was told not to do this again because Mom doesn't "enjoy these sort of things."

I suppose you could also say we pranked the dog and cat. They got flea treatment later that night, including a bath for the dog. The cat thanked us for the flea medication by coughing up a hairball (with food bits) the size of a chicken mcnugget right next to me. And that is why you should have hardwood floors if you have pets.

And if you don't know what a rickroll is, then click here. It's pretty informative.

April Fool

You know what sucks about getting older and more responsible at work? No more April Fool's jokes. At least not any really good ones. Ones that really freak people out. I had access to my department head's office while she was teaching a class (I was dropping something off and she had let me know her office was unlocked). And I did nothing to it. I played nice. Not even a little something. And I'll regret it for the rest of my life. Or at leas till next year when I don't think I can let such an opportunity go.

While the exact reason for this activity is lost to history, some speculate that it originates out of the transition to a calendar that started on January 1st. Those that did not know about the switch or refused to recognize it continued to celebrate April 1st as the start of the year and were the victim of pranks for their "ignorance".

I love pranks. A little anarchy. A little surrealism. Nothing cruel or mean. Just shaking up the status quo. Taking people out of their everyday habits. I have a cat named Loki. I have a tattoo of Coyote the Trickster.

Back when I was an undergraduate I worked at the campus radio station. And we knew that a certain key unlocked the station manager's office. So one night we put every chair in the station outside of the ones in the dj booth into his office. It was around 15 to 20 chairs. Another time we tped it. And I mean at least two rolls.

I could prank Wife but that isn't enough of a challenge. She trusts me. Well, enough that it would be too easy. Again, getting too old. Though there is still time. I think I'm going to have to make a phone call or two tonight. Somebody needs pranked. I'll let you know who I hit and how it goes. Maybe......

Rough day today

I'm having one of those days where you're not sure how you're doing. I've been wrestling with existential crises. Like am I ever going to be able to be a grown up? And where is the money going to come from?

For example, we want to get a house. It will be nice to own our own place. But then I realize houses have taxes that come due. And when something breaks you have to fix it. And yard work. I hate yard work. I have no desire to "putter around the yard." Sounds like hell to me. My personal theory is part of the reason my parents had so many kids was to have more cheap labor to pitch in around the yard.

And we have been discussing a second dog. But we can't agree on what kind of dog. And we can't do it yet anyway because our current lease only allows for one dog. I don't like her small dog choices and her big dog choices are totally impractical for the amount of space we have. For a little while there she was okay with a dachshund. Now she's not. So if we get another dog, we have to move.

And if we move I'll need a larger scooter for the longer commute. But the bike I really want is, simply put, more money than I should spend. I can get a used car for less. So I'm torn between desire and guilt.

Don't get me started on the issues surrounding the possible move.

I think I'm going to go play some video games and hide till this blows over.