I should be in bed

"I should be drinking a toast to absent friends instead of these comedians"
-Elvis Costello

I just got done sending a message to one of my oldest remaining friends. It's put me in a bit of a mood. It won't last long hopefully. My bad moods seldom do. On a certain level I'm grateful for that but on a different one they never really last long enough to spur me to do anything about them to ensure they don't come back.

Anyway, to focus on the business at hand, I'm real good about letting friends get away. I've moved a lot as an adult, trying to find my place in the world or what have you. Six states since I've left home for college, if you count the two months in Delaware one summer. I've made eight major moves in my life since graduating from Penn State. And what happens every time is I lose most of the people I've managed to make some level of friends with. Out of sight and it becomes way to easy for them to become out of mind.

Most of the time I prefer the company of my wife to any other person on the planet. Which should only make sense since I married her and all. But there are those rare moments when either she's busy or working or I want to do something that I know she has no interest in or the rare times when I want to talk about her but not with her.

Like this weekend. There's a scooter rally and it is about a five hour ride to get there. Six if you count the stops for gas, water, bathroom, and just resting your back and shoulders. And I have no one to ride it with. So I'm probably not going to go. And some guys I know are doing an event in Alabama but I don't feel strong enough in the relationship to figure out how to get invited along.

Bottom line, I feel lonely but I just don't want to deal with having to go through the effort yet again to make new friends. I want my old friends back. But I'm kind of doubting any of them plan on moving any time soon.

Well, at least it won't last for long. Hopefully.